Do I Need A Divorce
Many people will do anything to avoid divorce. Often, they are worried about how their families will react, or whether their children will be affected.
Deciding to end a marriage is never easy, and no one can make that decision for you. Below, we consider some of the more common concerns people have when they think divorce is on the horizon. If you have questions, contact a Wilmington divorce attorney.
Divorce and Children
By far the number one reason people stay married is for the kids. Typically, the children are still in school, and an unhappily married person decides to stay together until their children graduate high school or college.
This is not an unreasonable choice. Research shows that divorce often has a negative impact on children, especially in the first year. However, parents can often make things easier for their children. In fact, many children will bounce back to normal so long as their parents strive to make the separation amicable. This means co-parenting peacefully, making sure that the children maintain strong bonds with both parents, and not badmouthing the other parent to the children.
Nevertheless, some children are devastated by their parents’ divorce, and this also includes older children. Your children in their 20s or 30s probably look to your marriage as a blueprint for their own. When you divorce, they might begin doubting whether their own marriage will survive.
Another common reason to divorce is domestic abuse, whether that abuse is physical, sexual, or emotional. Getting away from an abuser is an important first step, but finally ending the marriage legally is another important landmark. By divorcing, you can begin to put your life back together and form healthier relationships.
Emotional abuse is often the hardest to walk away from, typically because people don’t believe it is as bad as physical violence. Some victims even wrongly believe that they have done something to warrant isolation, neglect, and negative comments. If you need help considering your options, consider talking to a mental health counselor, who can help you can some perspective on the trauma you have suffered.
When a spouse has an addiction, your world flips upside down. Addiction leads to all kinds of problems, including:
- Financial stress, as your spouse uses more and more resources to fund the addiction
- Neglect, as your spouse withdraws from friends and family
- Violence (in many cases) because your spouse feels as if he is spinning out of control
Addiction resources are available for those who want to get well, and you might want to try and salvage your marriage. For example, there is probably a 12-step program like Alcoholics Anonymous nearby. Not everyone with an addiction ends up getting divorced. However, your spouse must want to get well; you can’t beat an addiction for him or her.
Contact a Wilmington Divorce Lawyer
If your marriage is in trouble, you need steady legal guidance about your options. At Speaks Family Law, we have met with hundreds of people considering divorce, and we are here for you as well. Remember, meeting to discuss your options does not commit you to divorce.